1. |
constellation of doubt
03:26
|
|||
|
"an artist so fascinated by the desire for mastery
nothing is more impressive than that final phase in which the work shines suddenly above them..."
don't let the sultan fall asleep
only you can live in the house of dreams
enslaved hopelessly by our solitudinous salaries
poet or dreamer, what's the difference
echoes of disappearance at the midnight apotheosis
historical accidents that drown in melancholia
contingent anxieties that promise arriving alleviation
purveyor of decentered cemetery wisdom
cemetery wisdom
the heart of the night is an intimate alien
in the center of the space of literature
kings swallow the oneiric graveyard where equality dies
the endless chains connect beings-toward-death
do not agitate dreaming animals
our center of gravity inhibits self-dissolution
separation from the crucible compounds crucifixion
compounds crucifixion
"...a constellation of doubt which only shines in the forgotten sky of perdition"
|
||||
2. |
||||
|
bipedal nervous thing
knocked down to all fours
drowning in yr anxious beauty
my oxygen is the breath of a wolf
insert yrself into the core of my being
i saw you when i looked in the mirror
concentric circles with you in the center
clones of the vampire, bones of the dog
i want everyone to be the same
urban decay smothered in buttercups
they will try to trim you out
i'll kill them all, i'll make you sprout
i dont need a new persona, yr my other half
which implies alterity, when you're inside of me
traces of difference that i cant erase
the other side of identity i don't want displaced
individualities spun together, interspersed
introjecting each other, beyond our comprehension
we will never be One, we will never converge
parallel lines that will never meet
we're used to impossible fantasies we wont stop desiring
a plenitude of poison in my body and you've started sucking out the venom and spitting out syrup
i know you've covered the earth because i am on top of the world
|
||||
3. |
||||
|
your chest and a seashell are one-in-the-same
concepts and patterns, flattened tires and Saturn
white blood cells, contests, scepters and shame
energy that's flowing, my blood that's glowing
the waste that's been spilled, the body's been killed
i expend all that i can, the sovereign man that i am
you think it's all connected, that it can be perfected
i will climb the canyon fraught with danger
and endure the frostbite of thought
i am a stranger to all that I've known, to all I've become
i am a mess, my body is twisted, mauled, and mangled
the wolf howls at the moon as everything becomes untangled
|
||||
4. |
bleached cherries
04:08
|
|||
|
proteins denaturing in all of my muscles
diplopia's seeping thru, always seeing doubles
lifeblood's stopped, minor tachycardia
breathing thru tubes with my insane apnea
i'm grasping at straws, i'm dancing with dogs
the worst time to realize that things always matter
is when i ask questions that no one can answer
dual filters are failing, i want no dialysis
helpless and hopeless like a newborn nihilist
God has his reasons there'll be no accidents
halothane's giving me infinite paralysis
im the center of attention, im making a scene
my substance thirst is always ravenous
help me out of the hole when there's no more ketamine
i'm grasping at straws, i'm dancing with dogs
dreaming about nothing, empty nights like always
my mind stopped working long ago and there is no escape
fear pulsating thru my body in solitude
one day i'll be comfortable naked
remember when we'd taste the honeysuckles?
now i'm vomiting blood over white knuckles
|
||||
5. |
||||
|
cockroach shadows in the rough blue, they're all machines
covert surgery teams, tube down mouth, breathing dreams
i am what i perceive and receive in my head commands from the cell
keep the secret close to your heart, stay militant
everything that is happening is not a coincidence
the state in which maturity is reached, lost innocence
the sight of yr division might render you less insolent
tied down, try to break free
disembodied, embodied, dis-prefix is pre-fixed to the simulation
i am what i perceive and what i am is beyond human, my own comprehension
i know very well what's happening to me
lapsing in and out of comas
yanking out the needles
frantic forest promenade disintegrates into commands
in my breathtaking nudity
the skin i want off me
wooded slopes claim me
try to break free
roof access, helicopter taking me to our secret headquarters, no quarter
convulsive beauty in per ambulatory ambulatory, locked lavatory
mirror askew, one bath off center, tiles all around
i am what i perceive and what i am is absolutely
nothing will ever be the same, everything has changed
tied down, try to break free
|
||||
6. |
||||
|
history's scope perched on a sniper rifle
angel of history is stationary
fresh body sprawled in a monastery
truth moves in a spiral; they aren't final
pagans on the wheel, deface their idols
you were so calm in yr sanctuary
we all die - this time something coronary
i will show u everything, i will be yr bible
einstein overturned the paradigm
general theories contained in space-time
knowledge is history in which its situated
my philosophy has teeth; its mouth serrated
the notches in yr beliefs, illuminated
fringes of epistemology, ascend to the sublime
with what you know now, my spiteful disciple
spread the truth, my faithful emissary
i'm wide awake, face in Augustine, in the library
|
||||
7. |
||||
|
harpoons & pistols out on the steppes
what beauty melting can bring
animal displacement, kingdom's migration
hyperion is my king
presenting him burnt offerings
he wants something more, he needs it all
only one left in my hunting party
the beast's got me down to a crawl
pinned down, overpowered
my last measure
i reach inside its mouth and i pull it inside out
external hearts & kidneys, pulled apart by rabies
the tiger is my coat, the tiger is my prize
the lion's at my throat, leopard's in my eyes
the beast is at the altar
my god has promised me salvation
for his task i did not falter
it was a trick, cursed to damnation
his cunning i've succumbed
the beast i have become
|
||||
8. |
cut up & opened
03:34
|
|||
|
born into surgery
life on the table
sharp edge of a knife cuts us open and puts in labels
my ideology's perjury
unjustifiable strife
tied down, try to break free
remove my soul, displace my mind
sew my mouth shut, i'm not blind
i cant break my chains, i'm not anyone
you've done what you've done to me
and i will always be broken
you have me where you want me, you've already won
please don't untie me, please don't let me go
please don't change for me, i won't let anything show
please don't abandon me, please don't let me grow
please don't die, i want you to live forever
please don't know how i feel, i will not sever
i'm always choking and always frozen
please peer into me, cut up and opened
|
||||
9. |
a different evening
03:11
|
|||
|
i don't regret the things i've done
guilt should eat me up, i am remorse
i am engulfed by bad choices
dropping nukes of acute akrasia
in this house there'll be no fun
a car bomb's in the hearse
i cant tell who the voice is
exploding thoughts of aphasia
lycanthropic anxiety
i turn into someone else entirely
i'm the hyena, pouncing on nothing
turns the innocent into something
bad feelings all around, i can't come down
i can only sleep it away
but it starts again the next day
this will never go away, it's here to stay
i regret all the things that i've done
guilt eats me up yet i have no remorse
no remorse
|
||||
10. |
i have nothing to say
03:13
|
|||
|
i can't keep on choking down anxiolytics
weighing out micrograms on a silver scale
this decade is an absolute blur
stability is a chimera
something bad will happen
obsessed with useless things
philosophy in the boudoir
terrified obscure theories are a secret grimoire
i pretend i'm a genius critic but i'm parasitic
on the knowledge of others smarter
i'm a fraud
radiating semblances
there is nothing real about this
people pretend to understand even though they know they cant
there was one, but they're gone
there was one, but they're no one
incoherent noise
silence punctuated
i need to say something unrelated
i'm living on a vacillating precipice with capricious vicissitudes
irritating vagaries
expressing my love with tense disquietude
we are all held hostage by what we are thinking
the dog eats the lion without even blinking
my thoughts cant be stopped because that implies motion
obsessively stuck on the same exact notion
i say this and that without any action
lobotomize me and remove all my emotion
i want an absence to consume me, embrace me as its own
no more all-consuming fear of being alone
i do what i do out of pure desperation
anxiety will usurp me and take on the throne
of being the king of unyielding stagnation
but my problems don't mean anything to me
i know one day that i'll have my relief
that i will be free
i just need you to listen to me
|
||||
11. |
||||
|
white heat, contagious magic
habit dulls intensity, psychotic absences
dionsyian saturnalia, ecstasy in pharmakon
guillotines at work, paralysis in action
treading in a sea of criminal negation
shadowy potential, sacred malediction
morose haloes condemned to salvation
delirious denial of the dangerous dance
delirious denial of the diabolical dance
disordered senses of boundless rupture
animal gods dying sets violence in motion
boundless disorder of an amorphous nature
prison walls of separation
fragments divided between the chosen and the damned
forgotten festivals in deserted moorlands
clothes conceal what beauty denies
silent awakenings in the accursed twilight
an exuberant fusion suspends our mutual isolation
lost souls in the frantic proliferation of life
super-abundant animal darkness
anticipating the sickening triumph of putrescence
an image of humanity in an unsexed sanctuary
the fatality of a hateful beauty
transparent theologies, erotic passivity
sanctity dissolves euphoric resolve
delirious denial of the dangerous dance
delirious denial of the diabolical dance
|
||||
12. |
see you at the gallows
02:02
|
|||
|
i don't think i'll see you at the gallows
i don't think i'll see you at all
i will be your witness, i will be your priest
i will be your lawyer, i will be unleashed
for you i will be unleashed
i'm tied down, resigned to my fate
i'm not waking up, God'll just have to wait
i'm carrying the weight, i'm shouldering my enemy's ammo
ak-47s and books, the thousand yard stare is my ideal look
i'm ensnared in a web of doubt, as i look to my left
i see a small dog yawn, don't find it cute, i find it bereft of humanity
i will be your confessor, i will be your boss
i will be your father, i will be a loss
for you i will be a loss
so give me away like a litter of six you can't take care of
i'll never be the one you need, i'll always come up short
you can shout a retort but i won't listen as i'm skinning one of the six
you try and stop me but i am who i am and for you
i will be your nightmare, i will be your anguish
i'll be your misery, i'll let you languish
for you, for you i'll let you languish
|
||||
13. |
||||
|
you know that nerves always conquer me
i won't let that stop anything
take all the drugs that i need
so i'm the best that i can be
weather ruins plans but nature always ruined man
everything is new to me
cities all the same
no one is safe as long as we're here
we don't believe in anything
i will tongue you down in Hell
the planes depart and fly away
everything will stay the same
everything keeps on falling, who's to blame
our day is ruined, our plans fall apart, it's whatever
i want blizzards, i want God to control the weather
i need the snow to fall forever
|
||||
If you like igitur, you may also like:
supported by 5 fans who also own “constellation of doubt”
i've been listening to this album on repeat since i bought it and i love it more every time. i love rudy so much
go to album
Loser Dance Party
by Furry Loser
supported by 4 fans who also own “constellation of doubt”
Ayy yo why the fuck am I crying in the club rn?
go to album
supported by 4 fans who also own “constellation of doubt”
all of the vocal sweetness and tight arrangement of adz-era sufjan, all of the flexible inventiveness of the mountain goats, with incredibly human, queer, resonant lyric-writing. scuttlefuzz is the real deal, y'all.
go to album
Something's There But You're Not Sure What
by Friends of Fox Food
This compilation is a good cross-section of indie and lo-fi tunes from the community of the UK-based independent label.
go to album
featured on Bandcamp Radio Oct 4, 2016
go to album
Lazy Sun, Late Risers
by Happypills
Delicate bedroom dream pop with lyrics in Japanese.
go to album
trickyStoop 2022 Anniversary Compilation
by trickyStoop
supported by 4 fans who also own “constellation of doubt”
go to album
